It’s just a sad fact that for a decade or two, the deadline for this column to be sent to the not-even-close-to-a-hundred newspapers that publish it is, Monday, each week, at 12:00 noon.
A sad corollary to the sad fact above is that I seem to be completely incapable of writing the column early (unless an editor makes a cogent plea for such). When I say that I tend toward procrastination, what I mean is that procrastination tends to permeate every cell in my body. I doubt that I will ever know how well I might work were I not under pressure, because under pressure is pretty much the only way I work. I am impressed with my more disciplined colleagues. Disgusted. But impressed.
So, on Sunday evenings, usually rather late, I try to get a few words keyed into the computer for the column due the next day. If I can just nail down a paragraph or two, just make a start, words seem to continue to flow on the next morning. Unfortunately, on as many Sunday nights as not, I stare at the blank screen. My brain wriggles and writhes and I get, for my trouble, a yawn and a deep longing for the blissful oblivion of sleep. Sleep—I love it, and I’m good at it—is all too soon interrupted by Monday morning. About mid-morning, need and adrenaline kick in, and I write.
I read a fascinating book recently that recounted stories of a number of famously creative people, most writers, and their writing and working and living routines. Those routines varied widely. Some worked in spurts. Not at all for days and then furiously. Some worked intensely for hours, and then took long walks or long breaks or long sessions with friends at the local tavern. Most fell into or actively planned regular daily routines, though some were regularly and incredibly irregular.
For most of those folks, varying amounts—often copious amounts—of caffeine, nicotine, and alcohol were not uncommonly involved. I’m just reporting here. The book did not feature folks writing “faith” columns or regularly contributing to The Baptist Standard. All I can say personally is that I can’t imagine being so foolhardy as trying to write without the aid of coffee.
No surprise, it also helps if everyone else in the house is unconscious and it’s past the hour when civilized people usually call civilized people. In deep need, and if anyone nearby is still awake, I find noise-canceling headphones helpful—set to be almost totally silent, or to play some nice, light, and lyric-less saxophone and/or piano jazz, or to emit “white noise” such as airplane sounds (YouTube; people actually record this stuff and, surprise, for me it kind of works).
I hate Monday deadlines. I admit to having a weird view of Mondays. I love what happens on Sundays, but it’s no contradiction to say that I like Mondays because they’re as far as you can get from Sundays. In general, I like taking Mondays pretty much off. Except there’s that Monday deadline. Traditionally, a Monday break has been a good choice for pastors and barbers. One of my brothers, also a pastor, takes Fridays off because he says he’d hate to feel as bad on his days off as he would if he took Mondays. I understand. But did I mention that procrastination and I are conjoined twins? I need to grab hold of Monday before I put off taking it off and it gets away.
But there’s that deadline.
I should be able on, say, a Wednesday, to get Wednesday to self-identify as a Monday (poking reality in the eye is popular these days), get the juices flowing, take a couple of hours, and write. I should also be able to write a couple or three columns early. (I do, sometimes. Usually they’re “blow off steam” columns that get key-banged out and then stuck in a computer folder and molder, a good thing both for writer and potential readers.)
In any case, I’m about out of time explaining, lamely, why I’m about out of time.
I could nail this one down right now. Tack on something like… “Our Creator never rushes, never procrastinates, always does exactly what we need at exactly the right time. It was, after all, ‘when the time had fully come’ that ‘God sent forth his Son.’” That would morph it into something almost useful as a Christmas column. It would be finished, set aside, and ready. Not great, but ready. Months ahead.
Yeah, I could. But it’s Monday. 11:51 a.m. And I need it now.
You’re invited to visit my website, and I hope you’ll take a look there at my new “Focus on Faith” Podcast. At the website, just click on “Podcast.” Blessings!
Copyright 2023 by Curtis K. Shelburne. Permission to copy without altering text or for monetary gain is hereby granted subject to inclusion of this copyright notice.